Becoming Everyone’s Tech Support

Look, I am not against helping people. But trust me when I say this: it becomes a royal pain in my ass sometimes.

Let’s start with the simple fact that there are things I want to spend my time doing.

This blog.
My password vault project.
Reading current events.
Sitting at the freaking park and just playing on my phone for awhile.

Hell, I have a writers meeting I want to get to in 30 minutes, and I finally had to start telling people: I have shit I want to do too.

Because the second people know you understand computers or electronics, suddenly you become the neighborhood help desk.

“My phone is acting weird.”

“My email disappeared.”

“Can you look at my laptop real quick?”

“My WiFi won’t connect.”

And “real quick” almost never means real quick.

Half the time it turns into forgotten passwords, accounts tied to old phone numbers, ten years of popups installed from random downloads, or somebody handing you a device that looks like it survived a small kitchen fire.

And somehow, because you understand technology, you are expected to magically untangle all of it.

And now let’s address something people usually do not think about.

They are handing me their personal electronic devices and asking me to help fix them.

This brings up a number of issues that I honestly do have a problem with.

First off: I DON’T LIKE TOUCHING OTHER PEOPLE’S ELECTRONIC DEVICES.

Let me count the reasons why.

They can have personal information on that device that I simply do not want to know about. Photos. Emails. Banking information. Messages. Medical information. Private conversations. Things that are none of my business.

And then another thought enters my mind.

What happens if there is something illegal on that device?

Seriously. What am I supposed to do if I accidentally encounter something illegal while trying to fix somebody’s phone or laptop? That is not a situation I ever want to be put in.

Then there is the time issue.

How long is it going to take me to fix their problem?

I have things I want to do too, people.

And even though you might look at me and think, “He’s just sitting there having a beer,” or “He’s just sitting in the park scrolling on his phone,” guess what? Maybe I had a rough day. Maybe I already had a busy day. Maybe I simply want to shut my brain off for an hour and scroll Facebook looking for music.

That downtime matters to me too.

Most of the time these requests happen in public places.

Now I have somebody handing me their phone while other people are walking behind me, looking over my shoulder, possibly seeing that person’s private information while I am trying to help them.

That makes me uncomfortable.

And here is another thing people rarely think about.

What happens if I screw something up?

What if I accidentally delete something? Break an app? Lock them out of an account? Make the issue worse?

Am I suddenly expected to pay to fix it?

Because the second you touch somebody else’s device, there is an invisible pressure there. Even if they say, “Don’t worry about it,” you still feel responsible once your hands are on it.

AND, when people ask me to help them, a lot of times they are doing it in public places.

Then they wander off.

Seriously.

They hand me their phone or laptop, then walk away to start talking to somebody else while I am sitting there holding their entire digital life in my hands.

Meanwhile, I need them nearby because:

1. I am not going rooting around through somebody else’s device.
2. I may need passwords.
3. I may have questions.
4. I may need them to approve something before I touch it.

And honestly, I do not even like being left alone with somebody else’s electronics in the first place.

That puts me in a position I do not want to be in.

Then comes the funniest part of all.

Most of the time, they cannot even buy me a freaking beer for helping them.

Look, I am not going to stop helping people. Because at the end of the day, I do like being helpful.

But sometimes I just need to vent because I do not think people understand that this “free help” can become intrusive.

I may have stopped somewhere just to relax for a little while. Maybe I was trying to shut my brain off after a rough day. Maybe I was in the middle of thinking through something I was working on.

Then suddenly I am handed a phone, a laptop, or a tablet and my brain is right back in troubleshooting mode again.

And trust me, once my brain locks onto a technical problem, it is not always easy to just switch it back off.

Sometimes I just wanted to sit there, have a beer, scroll Facebook, listen to music, or simply exist for an hour without becoming somebody’s unpaid IT department.

And as an example of why I am posting on this subject right now, let’s talk about what is currently sitting in the back of my mind.

At the end of next week, I have to migrate this entire blog and website to a new hosting provider.

I want to do this right the first time so I can get the site back up and running as quickly as possible.

Yes, I can multitask. I have done that my entire life.

But migrating a website is not a simple matter.

There are files, databases, permissions, SSL certificates, backups, configuration changes, testing, and about twenty other little things that can go wrong if you are not paying attention.

So while somebody else may see me sitting there having a beer or scrolling on my phone, my brain may already be halfway inside a server migration checklist.

That is why sometimes these random “Hey, can you look at my phone real quick?” moments can become mentally exhausting.

Because even when I look relaxed on the outside, my brain may already be busy working on something else entirely.

Ok, I am done ranting. And yes, I will take some cheese to go with this Whine.

Also, this will most likely be the last post I make until after I migrate to my new web host. So, please stay tuned. I will be back.